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O.K., so I know that I'm not Audrey Hepburn. I'm not delusional, just a dreamer. Let me have my dream, why don't you?

I'm 30. That's new. I don't have a problem with 30. It's not 29 though. I probably need to grow up now, but I really don't want to. I pay my bills, I have a job and I'm married. That's enough for me. Otherwise, I live in a fantasy world where every day is Breakfast at Tiffany's. I'm pretty sure that all of the world's ales can be cured by eating a donut while looking at diamonds.

My husband is a starving artist (which means that I'm starving by default). When I met him he was in the middle of his junior year of art school. He had no money but wanted to marry me none-the-less. I don't really care about money, as long as I can maintain my fantasies. When he proposed, he gave me a beautiful vintage diamond ring from Tiffany's. The diamond is microscopic and I love it. He could have gotten a bigger diamond on a no name ring, but he knew that I would be thrilled to have a Tiffany's ring. I wear it with pride! That's one of the reasons why I love Bruno. He knows what's important and willingly participates in my fantasies.

I'm a writer, mostly ghost writing for a living. It's o.k.. When I was growing up I wanted to write mysteries for a living. Now I write about stuff that is a mystery to me. I won't do this for the rest of my life, but it's supporting us while Bruno goes to school so that's fine by me.

We both grew up in Southern California. Neither of us liked it. We aren't your typical LA folk. I've only had one tan in my entire life. Usually I'm transparent, I'm so pale. Neither of us has had plastic surgery. Bruno was an extra on The Wonder Years when he was a kid, but it wasn't like he wanted to be famous. It was just a fun way to pass the time. We weren't rock stars. No one ever stole a sex tape of us and posted it on the internet. We've never been chased by the paparazzi.

We moved to Detroit in December 2004. Life is different here, to say the least. Everyone predicted that I would hate it and they were WRONG. Yes, downtown Detroit didn't work out too well for us (our car was stolen, someone tried to break into our house while I was home alone) but once we moved to the 'burbs, life became grand. It's beautiful, quiet and a generally nice place to raise kids.

And speaking of kids, we want them. We haven't been able to get pregnant. I keep checking to see if Bruno's breasts have gotten larger, but nothing. Just kidding. He doesn't have breasts. I do, and they aren’t' getting any bigger. That's our weird way of predicting whether or not I'm pregnant each month. So far, no kiddies on the way, but we are doing it like rabbits just to make sure.

That's my deal. I have lots of boring stuff to post daily. Read it and drop me a line. I like email. I don't bite. Holly Golightly would never be so tacky!